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I won’t be turned down

Success story by , , Comments: 0, English
Updated: 10-29-2012 10:44
Jolanda had been a Funky Fish member for quite some time when she received an email from Rik. Jolanda’s desire was to meet someone and to feel quite soon that he’d be ‘the one’! When Rik asked her about a city trip, they were both obviously unaware of the feelings that were about to bloom. Neither do they know that, indirectly, they knew one another already.

Jolanda had been in a long-term relationship before, so she knew a little bit what to look out for. She wanted to meet someone with whom she could really fall in love with. She wasn’t really active on Funky Fish yet; she’d had some dates, but it never resulted in love. Whenever she received a bottle, she would answer politely, but actually there was not one profile that appealed to her.

Until Rik sent her a message. His profile caught her attention and she realized that it was time to act… They started emailing and it felt comfortable from the start. At least comfortable enough to take the next step: a date!

A date with an obstacle
But dating doesn’t come easy. Jolanda was going through a hectic time at work and she had to cancel their first date. A second date was planned, but life continued to be busy for Jolanda and due to a severe headache, she had to cancel the second date as well. But Rik didn’t give up.
Jolanda: “He must have thought: I won’t let her turn me down!”
They meet in a popular cafe and even meet many people they know. Nonetheless they have a lovely day. Very lovely.

During their second date, Rik honestly tells Jolanda that he very much loves spending time with her. That honesty characterizes him and actually their relationship as well: they talk about everything.
And what did Jolanda think? Well, from the very beginning a friend notices that Jolanda was smiling quite a lot.

A week apart
After that, everything started to happen very fast. Jolanda received an invitation from Rik’s friends and they go to church together. They see each other almost every week, they eat together and do lots of fun stuff. But then Christmas arrives and Rik leaves on a city trip… Missing Rik was harder for Jolanda than she expected, which was the same for Rik. He preferred being with her.

A couple of months later, another holiday is planned: Rik is going on a city trip with the group of his church. They will be leaving on Jolanda’s birthday, which isn’t really ideal. So he suggests the following: I can either stay home, or you can join us! She decides upon the latter, which turns out to be so much fun that many more trips soon follow.

Common friends
Currently, they have been together for about eleven months and still they are very happy together. Jolanda: ”We both have quite a busy social life and we are now able to integrate that into our lives.” Talking is key in their relationship. They talk about everything, including serious matters.
From the start, our relationship felt very familiar and when we look back at how things developed, we can see why. Jolanda lived where Rik used to live. That is why they have lots of common friends and acquaintances. Jolanda: “Indirectly we actually knew one another already!”
Their faith binds them together as well and they talk a lot about their point of views regarding a Christian life style. And yet they are part of different church denominations. “That plays second fiddle though”, Jolanda says, “Because we are able to share our faith and feelings, which I couldn’t in my previous relationship.”

The future
So, how are things now? Well, there are definitely plans for the future! Jolanda: “It’s not that we are in a rush, because it’s highly important that you get to know one another well. Planning a wedding for two years down the line is hard, so we just enjoy the present. Nonetheless, we’re both in our late twenties and things simply go a little faster than when you’re a lot younger.

What would Jolanda like to say to the Funky readers?
Getting to know each other always start at the beginning. And the way to do that is by asking questions and becoming familiar with someone’s personality. Be active regarding interaction and communication and don’t expect to be over the moon after the first date. As Rik and Jolanda’s story shows us: sometimes more dates are needed in order to ignite the spark!
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